First of all I want to say bless you for having the strength to tell your story and being a fellow survivor of childhood abuse. Your story was truly touching/inspiring (what I could actually get through) and very well written. You have a true talent for writing and I myself have recently found my talent for writing. It's something I can actually take pride in, that no one can take from me...
I'm sorry to say that I was only able to get through a few chapters of your story... This was simply because of the thought, of another innocent child having to go through such similar, horrific circumstances, was extremely painful to read. Especially having the true understanding from experience of how painful this truly was and still is. What I was able to read, was simply heart-breaking. All I can think of, is how I wish I could go inside these stories and rescue this girl, so I could give her the love, care and protection, she truly needed and deserved.
For years I have wanted to write about the abuse I suffered throughout my childhood to my adult life. Your courage has given me the push I needed. Now, more than ever I want to stop protecting my abuse (and others) through my silence and tell the world what happened. These parents (using the term very loosely) have gotten to go through life punishing their children with their own sick and twisted need to inflict degradation. While they go through life unfazed by their actions, without any responsibility for what we now have to carry with us for the rest of our lives. I refuse to hide any longer and I pray that more people start to speak up and stop turning a blind eye. I hope, maybe another child going through this right now can find the bravery that I didn't have to save their life, speak up and put these monsters on "trial".
I struggle everyday with the internal battle my mother and father created within me. However, I refuse to let them win, so I remind myself everyday I am "worth it", I am powerful, I am confident, I can "do it"/anything, I can make a difference and I will use this hurt, to fuel the fire of my future and to help others. I will be a force to be reckoned with and what was once the nightmare they bestowed upon me, will now become their worst nightmare, THE TRUTH.
We all are born with a special light that only we carry. That light is our unique power and in my ideal world every child/person will find their light
Again, bless you and thank you for sharing your story. I hope that my story will find its way to touching people's lives like yours has. I truly believe my story (and everyone's story) has a purpose and place somewhere in this world. Take care. (Sorry for the long winded comment! Lol)
(Everyone should check out the website for "Daughters Of Narcissistic Mothers" (It wouldn't let me add the link but just put www infront followed by .com to get to the site) it changed my life and I believe it can help others too- Help bring awareness to Narcissistic Personality Disorder *NPD*)
Sincerely,
Miss Marionette
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I’ve been wanting to write a book about my story. I just find it extremely hard to get my thoughts together because reminiscing just hurts to much I rather just forget and can’t. I self diagnosed my self with PTSD. I have horrible realistic nightmares of the fear I had as a child. I even struggle being a mom feeling like sometimes my angry outburst(mostly yelling because she won’t listen when I tell her to do something Adding curse words but never words to make her feel like she’s not beautiful or that I don’t live her, but I do struggle with showing her as much love as she deserves because she deserves the best life and mother god can ever give a child. It’s just hard sometimes.)will ruin my perfect child. I’ve overcame a lot as I became older and a mom ,and I make sure and try my hardest not to ever make the mistakes that my mom, father, and step father did to me. How have you been able to manage, because I feel like counseling isn’t enough. Have you ever had nightmares or still do?
